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Laughlin
Table Report A man staggers into
an emergency room with two black eyes and a five-iron golf club wrapped tightly around his
throat. Naturally the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, it was like this,"
said the man, "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her
ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look
for it, and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at
its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was my wife's
golf ball
stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt.
That's when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the
doctor. Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to
my wife, Hey, this looks like yours!" Before
I jump right in to how the tables are in this mini gaming Mecca, let us look at a primer
on what Laughlin is all about.
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Laughlin,
Nevada is a gaming destination about 90 miles south of Las Vegas. Its on the southernmost tip of Nevada,
right at the Arizona and California border. The
Colorado River separates the three states at this point.
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By
the way, it is pronounced Loff-linn.
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In
1966, Don Laughlin bought a long-bankrupt eight-room motel and bar. The nearest population-center was about 35 miles
away. A couple of years later the
Postmaster-General needed a destination name for this outpost on the banks of the Colorado
River
and so Laughlin, with a 1968 population of 1, was born.
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The
Riverside Motel & Casino opened with 12 slot machines and 2 blackjack tables. Most of his original employees came from
Bullhead City, Arizona or they made the then four-hour (now 90 minutes) commute back and
forth to Las Vegas.
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In
67, The Bobcat Club (the current Golden Nugget-Laughlin) opened.
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As
more and more people moved to southern Nevada and western Arizona for retirement, Don
Laughlin expanded the Riverside Hotel to its current size of 1400 rooms.
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There
was a building boom in the mid-80s and very early 90s that saw
eight major casinos built. Everyone from Boyd
Gaming with its Sams Town-Gold River Casino (currently the River Palms
Resort), to the Flamingo Hilton-Laughlin, Harrahs Del Rio and Circus Circus
(now Mandalay Bay Resorts) own Edgewater Hotel and Colorado Belle Resort Casino built
large gaming destinations.
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Greater
Metropolitan Laughlin has a current population of 11,731.
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There
are now over 10,000 rooms and suites at these resorts, in addition to over 4,000
fully-serviced RV spaces for the retired continent-roving recreational-vehicle set.
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Theres
enough shopping to keep your wife AND your girlfriend happy for a little while at least. A 55-store Outlet Mall with the de-rigueur likes
of The Gap, Polo, Reebok, Levi, Corning, Bass, IZOD, and a 9-theater cinema is right
across the street from the casinos. Everything
is within a 5/8-mile action-strip.
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All
of the casinos are within walking distance of each other, plus there is a water-taxi
shuttle that stops at each casino. No need
for taxis (although they are available) when you can hop on a pontoon-style open-air
shuttle-boat.
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Hotel
rates range from $12 to $49 for first-class accommodation.
There arent as many suites available in these houses, but all of the
rooms are either river-view or mountain-view.
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There
are over 60 quality casino-restaurants that cater to all tastes and preferences. The ubiquitous buffet is found here in EVERY
casino just as God intended. The best is
Harrahs and the Golden Nugget (no surprise), while the worst is the Colorado Belle
and The Edgewater (again, no surprise as they are both part of the Mandalay Resort family
(read Circus Circus)
corporate-slop same-crap, different
plate low-quality buffets.
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There
are really only two expensive restaurants in town, where a meal will run two of you in the
$80+tip range. The Gourmet Room at the
Riverside, and the Lobster Bar at Tarzans in the Golden Nugget are definitely fine
high-end restaurants.
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All
the other restaurants in town are very moderately priced, and the quality is
generally good to very good.
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Comps
are pretty much free-flowing at all of the resorts in this town. Even low-rollers will have their game-play rated
MUCH higher here than at their Vegas counterparts. The difference between Laughlin and
Vegas player-comp requirements is about the same as the difference between Strip-comps
versus Downtown LV-comps. Expect moderate
craps play here to get you good to excellent comp-treatment. Ill comment specifically on each resorts
comp policy in a moment.
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The
best comp-savvy houses are in this order:
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Water-sport
activities are king in Laughlin because of the Colorado River at the front door of each
casino. Jet-Ski (Waverunner and Sea-doo) and jet-boat rentals are widely available, as
well as riverboat sight-seeing and dining cruises. There
are several decent beach areas at Harrahs, the River Palms Resort, and especially at
the Avi Resort.
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There
is also a number of widely attended spectator/participant events like the Hot August
Nights car show (similar to Reno) and River Run cruises; several off-road
desert-racing events, hydroplane boat races, and a number of rodeo events. For the events where admission is charges, these
are all easy comps for minimum casino-play.
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Weather
is generally 10-to-15 degrees warmer than Las Vegas.
In the summer, that can be a bad thing as temperatures get into the
120-to-135-degree range. Fall through Spring
temperatures are in a more reasonable 70-to-85 degree range.
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Generally
the staff that you encounter in Laughlin is much friendlier than youll usually find
in Vegas. Now this is all subjective, as I
find that I am treated quite well no matter where I go, but I find a kinder, gentler,
lower-key attitude here than in Mecca. As
you travel from Los Angeles to Las Vegas to Laughlin, the down-home Western friendliness
seems to increase exponentially.
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The
5-million visitors here each year are generally lower-key and a little older than the Las
Vegas Strip crowd, but that also means LOWER TABLE LIMITS and more SOLO-SHOOTING
OPPORTUNITIES for Precision-Shooters. Okay,
thats the primer on Laughlin. One
of the reasons that I play in Laughlin quite a bit is because of those last two points. The low table limits are especially attractive
when my Precision-Shooting is less than precise; and the tables present a
higher-percentage and frequency of solo-shooting opportunities. Even
on a busy weekend, and yes, I am also talking about holiday weekends, the tables in
Laughlin are not that crowded. And if some of
them are, you can simply seek out the higher limit $5 tables for some lesser-crowded
conditions. Sure the 25-cent game at the
Edgewater will be packed as it usually is, but just use the Riverwalk to stroll over to
its next door neighbor, The Flamingo Hilton, and youll pretty much have the
tables to yourself. So
lets take a look at the playing conditions in Laughlin. We might as well start at the first casino that
brought gaming to this part of the Colorado River: Riverside
Resort Hotel & Casino
The
Riverside Hotel has decent playing conditions. Their
tables are of the 16-foot variety, and their dealers are veterans of the green felt
jungle. Expect to find $1 tables here most of
the time. During busy periods, they may open
additional tables at $2 minimums. I
havent seen a $5 table here in quite a while, but I was told that they had one set
at that level during the 2002 Labor Day Weekend. Dice-setters
are free to set the dice as they wish. There
is absolutely NO problem at all. A courteous
toke for the boys is always greatly appreciated. Generally
the dealers toke-rate in Laughlin is about 70% to 80% lower than in Vegas, so ANY tokes
are appreciated. Just dont take too
long to school the dice when you set them, or any social-goodwill that
youve built up, will quickly evaporate. What
else can I tell you about this joint? While
their pool is not that great, Don Laughlin has assembled an excellent car-collection. If you are interested in purchasing any of the
cars, most display their sale price. So if
you are interested in a concours candy-apple red, 1959 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 390 cu.
in. 3x2 Tri-Power convertible for under $80,000; then this is the place. They also have antique slot machines and a variety
of other historic casino collectibles on display. A
nice feature of this hotel is that most of the rooms, and all of the suites have
fair-sized balconies. Its nice to have
an early morning coffee or late night libation overlooking the banks of the mighty
Colorado on your own balcony. Im
not a big fan of their buffet, but its an easy comp, as is their 34-lane bowling
alley and 6-plex movie theater. Speaking of
comps, their USS Riverside dinner cruise is a fairly easy comp for a bettor
who normally spreads $15 to $35 on the layout. In
addition, their headliner acts which run along the lines of Freddy Fender, the Kingston
Trio, Ricky Van Shelton, Oak Ridge Boys, The Lettermen and Gallagher are also compable
shows for $10 to $25 players. Flamingo
Hilton Laughlin
The
Flamingo Hilton Laughlin (now just called The Flamingo-Laughlin) has short tables, and
almost always has new table felt. Expect to
find very professional dealers and pit personnel, and NO hassles for setting the dice.
They
do get their fair share of medium-to-high rollers, and you will see them give extra
service to these players. If the big-player
wants the dice to move quickly, then expect the dealers to get the dice returned to you
quickly. This is not the time to be fiddling
with the dice. If you are not as adept as you
should be in your dice-setting speed; then more AT HOME PRACTICE is required. Again, game speed is big-player
dependant here, in a similar manner as it is in Atlantic City at Taj Mahal. You
can expect to find $2 minimums here, although there have been several times when the only
table that is open is set at a $5 minimum. There
doesnt seem to be any logical reason to their variation of setting either a $2, $3,
or $5 table, as it is rarely busy in here. When
it is, you can expect their two main tables to be locked-in at $5. Like I said, their veteran dealers are
highly-skilled and proficient, which means that they show extraordinary appreciation and
accommodation for a consistent toker. Their
two main hotel towers are named The Arizona and The California Towers. Combined, they total 1900 rooms and 30 suites. I can tell you that the suites are in much better
condition than their Las Vegas or Reno namesakes. I
would think that the suites here get significantly less wear and tear from infrequent use. A
$10 to $25 base flat-bet player is considered a medium-strength player as far
as player-hierarchy is concerned in this 60,000 square foot gaming-house. Full-suite RFB+++ from the Flamingo Hilton
requires about $25 in action for 4 hours a day to warrant that comp. Food
here is comparable to the other two Flamingo Hiltons.
Youll find Alta Villa, the usual 24/7 diner (Lindys), the standard
Hilton Buffet and the Beef Baron, just as you will in LV and Reno. Current entertainment runs the what-ever-happened-to gamut of the Four Tops, Harvey Corman/Tim Conway, Neil Sedaka, Englebert, the Smothers Brothers and Kenny Rogers. Though not terribly exciting, entertainment-comps are quite easy to get for low to moderate play. Colorado
Belle
Colorado
Belle is part of the Mandalay Resort Group which includes Luxor, Monte Carlo, and
Excalibur in its family. Unfortunately, it
also includes Nevada Landing and Gold Strike (in
Jean, NV near the California border) in the same family.
The Colorado Belle and its sister property in Laughlin regrettably
take after the lower end CircusCircus and Nevada Landing side of the family a lot more
than the Mandalay Bay and Monte Carlo siblings. That
means that it serves the low-end of the market, and it cuts as many corners as it can. This affects nearly every aspect of your
stay in this 70,00 sq. ft. gambling den. On
the good side of the equation, that means that they have good, cheap tables. Short, beatable tables and low $2 limits make this
a good-payer. If they have more than one table open, you can expect at least one of them
to have a $3 bet minimum instead of the standard $2 one. The
tables are predictable and consistent in their dice-reactions, and I have never had any
trouble finding a sweet-spot that brings in the winnings.
For Laughlin, I would have to rate these tables in third-place just behind
the Flamingo tables for winning-potential. I
rate the Pioneer tables as the current best in town. However,
lightly-experienced staff and 2X odds, may limit your fun factor at the Colorado Belle.
They tend to get crowded on the weekends, with plenty of inexperienced players. They
are trying to create a party atmosphere here, so youll find personable dealers who
are pretty good at their job. There is almost
always a $500 table limit in place, but if you ask nicely, theyll usually raise the
limit to $1000. This pretty much eliminates
the risk of hitting your head on the table-max if you get on a super-hot roll. Like
I said, the dealers are all pretty friendly and with the amount of inexperienced players;
they show a lot of patience, restraint and encouragement when it comes to dealing with
players who has absolutely no idea what they are doing.
I agree with their philosophy. Even
though I prefer to play at empty tables, I encourage new players to join in and play the
game. We
shouldnt discourage new players from joining in and learning the game. They are the lifeblood of continuing availability
of craps. The more we sneer and grunt at new
players, the more that this game will die out. The
grumpy old codgers who make the game look and feel as unwelcoming as they can, are turning
new players off. Listen, its hard
enough for a craps table to compete against the never-ending voracious appetite of the
golden toilets that we call slot-machines. We
should not add to their game-killing effect by discouraging newer or younger players. On
the bad side of the Circus Circus (MBG) ownership equation for the Colorado Belle, you
have the food, the rooms and the generally slightly run-down feel to everything. Their 1200 rooms are in dire need of renovation,
especially in the low-level Mardi Gras section of rooms and suites which sport
decent-sized balconies right on the banks of the Colorado. Their
food is hit-and-miss. Okay, its mostly
miss on the quality target, so I would take a pass on the buffet, diner and
the Orleans gourmet room unless you are close to collapsing into a diabetic coma. This is not the place you would pick if it were to
be your last meal here on Gods green earth. River
Palms Resort
The
River Palms Resort is the 1000 room hotel-casino initially developed by the Boyd Group as
Sams Town-Gold River. The
early 1990s bankruptcy of Sams Town was due in part to Boyds
misunderstanding of the market. There
wasnt a solid local market for them to reach, and they refused to be involved with
the lucrative overnight-junket markets from nearby Phoenix, Flagstaff, San Bernardino,
Tucson and San Diego. This rare Boyd failure
has become Laughlins gain. River
Palms is Laughlins biggest casino, so it never seems crowded even on the busier
weekends. Youll almost always find $2
or $3 tables, even during the holidays. They
are dice-setter friendly, and their medium-length tables are decent enough to get some
good consistency. But they WILL NOT usually
raise their $500 max table-limit. At least
they wouldnt do that for a couple of higher-rolling compadrés while I was there. I
find that their tables are similar to those found at the Mirage in Vegas. The great thing about the River Palms tables is
that the dice circulate the lightly-populated tables quite rapidly. The more you get to shoot; the more consistent your
results should be. If that isnt the
case; then it probably is not the tables, and rather your shooting needs substantially
more practice. The
rooms here are in very good condition, and all of the river-facing suites have
floor-to-ceiling windows. While there are no
balconies, which by this point, I gather you have figured out that I really like, the
vista from the hotel tower is still outstanding. The
food on the other hand is mediocre at best. While
I have never had a bad meal here, I havent had any outstanding ones either. Madeleines Lodge is their gourmet room and
it has an up-market lounge attached to it. And
while you shouldnt expect 5-star dining, youll only receive a 1-star bill. Speaking
of comps. They are VERY generous for $10+
players. Full RFB+++ for players with a
steady $15 to $30 of spread action will be granted. This is one of the few joints where they are
approaching YOU to give you a comp before you have to approach THEM to
ask for one. I really like that
idea. Entertainment is low-key, but their beach is first-class and you will find all the grown-up water-sport toys are available here. Yes, they are compable if you are a hotel guest, as is the only car-wash in town which is on their property. Now this is the only casino that I know of that will comp car-washes. In Part Two of this article, we'll finish our Precision-Shooters look at the rest of the Laughlin casinos. Until then, Good Luck & Good Skill at the Laughlin Tables...and in Life. The Mad Professor
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