| Volume 14 : Issue 6 | |
| In This Edition: | The End is Near… The End Survey |
From the Editor: The End is Near, This is the End
First, I want to report a record number of emails commenting on last month’s newsletter article on Table Manners by our colleague at Playing4keeps.com. Either ya’ll read the May news, or it hit a nerve. The summation of communication… “Anyone who plans to play craps needs to read Table Manners before even thinking about playing craps.”
Next, the newsletter is late… ya’think? I was playing hooky in the City of Dreams. No, not really, I was playing craps and poker. Soft Touch was busy herself so when the Queen Bee was away, the cat flew to Las Vegas. No war stories. Hooked up with the Dice Coach for some laughs, and paid the rent.
The June newsletter that was in the barrel got ejected for inspiration from the enlightenment that shined from the email letter following below, in just a bit.
Normally, I don’t make edits to letters to the editor, typos, misspellings and grammar error are kept as is. However, I have children and being a math guy, I figured the odds. One or two others out of the thousands of DS.com subscribers have kids too. At the same time, I felt it important that the dice setting community have a similar gut-shot reaction that I had, when I opened my email after returning from Vegas.
Okay, short war story… I played several strip casinos. I was welcomed at every game. Oh, and I set the dice every throw. I did not hit the back wall every time. Sometimes, a die even jumped over the wall and it rolled on down the hall. Jim Morrison has a song about walking on down the hall. I think the lyrics are in the tune The End. Click it on, and listen while you read on.
Anyway, back to letters to “Ed”. I pasted the email into this newsletter and placed an asterisk within certain words to protect the innocent. Although, the asterisks do little to disguise certain words, it softens the impact. Be forewarned, it could still be offensive and you may wish to cut losses now and exit this newsletter…maybe disengage from the You Tube also. Cheers.
Okay, if you are still here, I received a rather blunt note from an alleged casino pit boss that wanted me to know how miserable DS.com was making his life. Apparently dice setting idiots reading this shoddy web site are about to put an end to the table game of craps. Thank goodness it is not because dice setters are taking it to the counting room’s bottom line. It seems that we are just a bunch of arses, mucking up the game, and causing distress to the operators of the game. It seems that you are just wasting your time along with the other 20+ thousand monthly hits to the site.
Gaming is no doubt the financial focus of anyone who is conscious about the public’s fascination with gambling. Although our uncle has clamped down on U.S. players from on-line risk, other countries are still in business. Revenue, just from mobile devices last year, accounted for… are you ready for this… $10,000,000,000. If I got the zeros right that figure should read ten billion dollars. If you are sitting down, better stand up. If you are standing, better sit down. In the next few years, like three, the figure is going to jump by 640%. Now, if you struggle with the payouts with casino odds, take it easy. Drop all the zeros and simply multiply 10 X 6.4 and then say the word billion. Yep, 64 billion.
Next question, how long do you think it is going to take uncle to figure out he’s missing out? Heck, even two or three states are cashing big time on what was once banned herbal mood enhancer. The NSA is even looking at sites like DS.com, which is promoting absolute nonsense, so gotta be careful and not use the word marijuana here.
Anyway, once the flood gates are open and “casino corporate” decides all the extra patrons from noxious dice setting web sites are too much to bother with, they’ll put an end to dice setting. Maybe even the game. That should also take care of disgruntled pit bosses and them having to be pleasant to the customers. On that day, I guess playing craps in my underwear well have to do. On the plus side I won’t have to fly to Vegas. I’ll not miss having my genitals fondled by moronic TSA, high school drop-outs, that are rude enough to be casino bosses, but couldn’t hack the fourth grade math test to qualify. It will also provide me a few extra bucks in savings on hotels and restaurants by staying home to play craps on-line. Hey, Miss Bucket, how’s that for a bunch of run-on senseless sentences?
Anyway, not to prejudice you here. The email is coming up followed by The End survey. Thanks for the good times y’all. It has been a great ride. Seven out, line away.
From: The Pit Bull [mailto:withheld@XXX.com]
Sent: Thursday, June 19, 2014 7:08 PM
To: ed@dicesetter.com
Subject: Deleted
You know something? You guys have ruined the game of craps. Dicesetting is a bunch of bullsh*t and has caused me more stress and grief than anything else in my life.
Everyone who wants to play craps goes online, looks at your sh*tty website and then comes and tries to pull all the bullsh*t you are feeding them.
In my opinion if you don’t shoot the dice into the wall it is not a roll, Kissing the wall or dropping one short is not an option and will never be one on my game. Dicesetting is at best a poor attempt at cheating.
The casino’s are all tired of putting up with this and soon setting the dice will no longer be allowed on the games. Not because it works but because it causes too many problems.
Dice setting is just like teaching a pig to sing. You are wasting your time “and mine” and it annoys the pig.
So please just take that sh*t down before we all lose it.
Sincerely,
The Pit Bull
Click here for The End – Survey
Before closing, and in the name of free speech and guns, in all the years of playing craps, blackjack and poker, not one casino has ever provided me with printed rules of the games, let alone posted them on a near by wall. How is a beginner of the game supposed to know what they don’t know? [Especially after all the shoddy, free information gaming websites, which promote gaming to potential casino customers, (free of charge), are all closed down, in order to keep casino operators happy.] True, a few casinos have free craps lessons, usually at ten in the morning for about an hour, in which they cover all the bets…in about an hour. Otherwise it is “plan B”. “Oh, just belly up with your cabbage kid. If you don’t do it right kid, the big man in the thousand dollar suit with too tight Italyan slippers will s’plain it to you in plain “East Coast” language. You’re sure to understand or go running home like a sissy to your momma.” Nice job Bull, a little light on customer appreciation maybe, but what the heck, in another year a new crop of twenty-one year olds will be knock’n down the doors begging for you to take their innocents.
I don’t get it. Pit Bull has enough time on his hands to bully me, but not the simple sense of publishing the casino’s expectations of all the things causing him and all the rest of the casinos stress from the “idiots” still reading this junk. [Yes, I know, even if he did, the idiots won’t read it…] But, you know what? It is simple enough for Bull to copy and paste stuff I have published here, never mind from all the others who have written about appropriate play to avoid casino heat. Okay, Bull would have to wade through over 2,000 pages, but it is here.
I suppose I could create a special page, How to Avoid Heat. One hand on the dice, don’t let your drunk girlfriend slobber all over the dice, (or boyfriend) don’t raise the dice above the chip rail, you must hit the back wall with both dice, don’t take longer than five seconds, don’t make late bets, don’t enjoy what you are doing, it’s only a game, don’t expect to win,…yada yada, but this is the end, so no point. Heck, I just published an article last month about proper etiquette for craps players by what’s his name…? Doesn’t matter.
In education, when Billy can’t read, the teacher teaches Billy to read. When Billy can’t do the math, the teacher teaches Billy how to do the math. When Billy can’t behave, the teacher punishes Billy for not knowing how to behave. It seems that casino management abides by the same protocol used by public schools. If a player does not know the expectations for a craps game, then it’s the player’s fault. When Billy can’t hit the back wall and takes too long with the dice…It the fault of Dicesetter.com. I can’t argue with crazy. Crazy is right. Shut it all down. But what’s crazy going to do for fun. Guess there is always music lessons for pigs.
Twenty-four years of casino play and not once have I had the experience that my business was not welcomed. Guess my friend, that this is the end. My beautiful friend, the end.
I don’t think that I’ll be see’n ya at the tables… It will have to be in space…cyber. Ciao.
If you’re feeling a little blue now, try this pill with Buddy Guy.
Dice Setter.com Newsletter™ was published by DiceSetter.com. It was intended to be informational and entertaining. Do not consider the information a guarantee for supplementing or replacing income. Casino games are adult entertainment, games to be played and enjoyed. It was the intention of the publisher to provide information so the reader may play with more enjoyment. Opinions expressed by the contributing authors are not necessarily shared or endorsed by the publisher. Winning is a goal and not a guarantee.
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